Holy cow, there is so much going on both in the City in general and the world of pop culture.
For one, Lollapalooza is this weekend in Grant Park and I really wish I could go. It's a great place to have it, although downtown can get congested under the best of circumstances. But being outside in a really beautiful park, surrounded by magnificent buildings on one side and the Sea of Michigan on the other - what could be better? The lineup this year is really good, too, which makes me even more bitter about missing it. I was surprised to see Smoking Popes on the roster (they're still around?!?) and seeing Wolfmother listed just made me smile. It's nice to see old faves like the Reverend Horton Heat and Violent Femmes along with some of my new faves, Dresden Dolls, Gnarls Barkley and She Wants Revenge. If you're going, you're a lucky bastard.
I will, however, be going to the geek festival know as Wizard World. Make fun of me all you want, but Wizard is far cheaper for me ($25 versus $65 for one day) and takes far less time, which means I can squeeze it into my already packed weekend schedule. I have a short list of comics I'm looking for such as the last half of the Ocean mini series that I missed, for example, and all of the issues of 52, since I've managed to miss those as well. I hope I find some deals!
Thursday, August 3, 2006
Friday, October 28, 2005
Scary Monsters
Halloween is probably my favorite time of year. I love costumes, I love candy, I love monsters, but most of all, I love scary movies.
Or at least I used to. The current crop of horror flicks from Hollywood are pretty damn banal. Either they are remakes of classic horror films or bland American remakes of new and interesting films from Japan, China and Korea. I'll admit that Hollywood is an easy target, but these movies are being made for a reason: people will go to see them. This is sort of a chicken and the egg situation, though. Is Hollywood making bad movies because that's what the audience wants to see, or is the audience going to see bad movies because that's all Hollywood makes? My gut tells me that with the success of smart, interesting and fresh films (especially indie films) that it's simply the later. People want to be entertained so they'll pretty much go see any movie that looks remotely interesting, then bitch about it afterwards.
But, I digress. What I really wanted to talk about was good scary movies, the ones that scared me as a kid and still scare me now. In honor of Halloween, here's a list of some of my favorites and why you should watch them. These are sorted by category.
Now I'm feeling Zombified
Night of the Living Dead: the original film seemed all the scarier to me because it was shot in black-and-white. I think it must be the way shadows are rendered (see anything made by the Germans in the 20s if you don't believe me). This film plays on a primal fear of death and the dead (not to mention cannibalism!) and the tone and acting was quite serious; Romero never talked down to his audience nor did anything at their expense.
Shaun of the Dead: not a horror film in the traditional sense, this comedy starts dark and gets darker. It plays upon the zombie genre as a metaphor for growing up and can be funny, scary and heart-breaking all at the same time.
Dead Alive: This was the first movie I saw from Peter Jackson and much later, when I heard he was making The Lord of the Rings movies, I had a difficult time reconciling the two. Sure, he had also directed Heavenly Creatures, but then again, he had directed Meet the Feebles. Anyway, this is another zombie horror comedy with plenty of over-the-top gross-out effects, great action and quotable lines ("I kick ass for the Lord!" still makes me laugh my ass off).
28 Days Later: This was surprisingly effective movie that plays upon fears of contagion and fears about our fellow humans, imagining what would happen if we were compelled to act upon our basest impulses.
Evil Dead 2: worth it just to hear Bruce Campbell say "Groovy."
Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me
Seven: The sheer ugliness of the movie makes it both fascinating and repulsive. Every scene is filled with darkness and dread and when the horrible truth comes to light, the filmmakers do not cop out or allow you to look away. Probably one of the best films I have ever seen.
The Sixth Sense: Speaking of dread, it is nearly overwhelming in this film. This is a perfectly made story and although much is made about the surprise ending, there is enough detail, metaphor and lovely moments to make repeat viewings a treat.
Jacob's Ladder: What scared me about this film was its panicky freakiness; even at the end you were never quite sure what just happened and what was really going on. Like most good horror films the main character's fear, confusion and pain is palpable.
The Shining: This is, of course, Jack Nicholson's movie and it's a great deal of fun to watch him come unhinged. The weird touches, like the twin girls and the strange figures in costume make this a very creepy and unnerving film.
The Exorcist: Linda Blair is the Exorcist what Jack Nicholson is to The Shining - it's a perfect peformance.
Monsters!
Halloween: I watched this movie recently and was surprised at both how well it held up and how slow it builds - even though you may know what happens, the tension is still there. I still can't watch this alone and in the dark. Bonus points for an extra creepy soundtrack.
Alien: This movie at times has an almost dreamlike quality to it. It's beautifully shot as well as horrifying (the alien coming out of John Hurt's stomach is still one of the best moments in horror film history). And the alien is beautiful and disturbing.
Nosferatu: This film is still a beautiful example of German Expressionism, the movement that probably did the more for cinematography than any other school, director or technology. The vampire is ugly and creepy, much different from the charismatic vampires that would follow in movies and TV.
Ginger Snaps: This wicked little gem uses lycanthropy as a metaphor for growing up or more specifically, for puberty. Like I Was a Teenaged Werewolf before it, it puts teens in the roles of werewolves, but this time with a smart, witty and scary script.
Or at least I used to. The current crop of horror flicks from Hollywood are pretty damn banal. Either they are remakes of classic horror films or bland American remakes of new and interesting films from Japan, China and Korea. I'll admit that Hollywood is an easy target, but these movies are being made for a reason: people will go to see them. This is sort of a chicken and the egg situation, though. Is Hollywood making bad movies because that's what the audience wants to see, or is the audience going to see bad movies because that's all Hollywood makes? My gut tells me that with the success of smart, interesting and fresh films (especially indie films) that it's simply the later. People want to be entertained so they'll pretty much go see any movie that looks remotely interesting, then bitch about it afterwards.
But, I digress. What I really wanted to talk about was good scary movies, the ones that scared me as a kid and still scare me now. In honor of Halloween, here's a list of some of my favorites and why you should watch them. These are sorted by category.
Now I'm feeling Zombified
Night of the Living Dead: the original film seemed all the scarier to me because it was shot in black-and-white. I think it must be the way shadows are rendered (see anything made by the Germans in the 20s if you don't believe me). This film plays on a primal fear of death and the dead (not to mention cannibalism!) and the tone and acting was quite serious; Romero never talked down to his audience nor did anything at their expense.
Shaun of the Dead: not a horror film in the traditional sense, this comedy starts dark and gets darker. It plays upon the zombie genre as a metaphor for growing up and can be funny, scary and heart-breaking all at the same time.
Dead Alive: This was the first movie I saw from Peter Jackson and much later, when I heard he was making The Lord of the Rings movies, I had a difficult time reconciling the two. Sure, he had also directed Heavenly Creatures, but then again, he had directed Meet the Feebles. Anyway, this is another zombie horror comedy with plenty of over-the-top gross-out effects, great action and quotable lines ("I kick ass for the Lord!" still makes me laugh my ass off).
28 Days Later: This was surprisingly effective movie that plays upon fears of contagion and fears about our fellow humans, imagining what would happen if we were compelled to act upon our basest impulses.
Evil Dead 2: worth it just to hear Bruce Campbell say "Groovy."
Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me
Seven: The sheer ugliness of the movie makes it both fascinating and repulsive. Every scene is filled with darkness and dread and when the horrible truth comes to light, the filmmakers do not cop out or allow you to look away. Probably one of the best films I have ever seen.
The Sixth Sense: Speaking of dread, it is nearly overwhelming in this film. This is a perfectly made story and although much is made about the surprise ending, there is enough detail, metaphor and lovely moments to make repeat viewings a treat.
Jacob's Ladder: What scared me about this film was its panicky freakiness; even at the end you were never quite sure what just happened and what was really going on. Like most good horror films the main character's fear, confusion and pain is palpable.
The Shining: This is, of course, Jack Nicholson's movie and it's a great deal of fun to watch him come unhinged. The weird touches, like the twin girls and the strange figures in costume make this a very creepy and unnerving film.
The Exorcist: Linda Blair is the Exorcist what Jack Nicholson is to The Shining - it's a perfect peformance.
Monsters!
Halloween: I watched this movie recently and was surprised at both how well it held up and how slow it builds - even though you may know what happens, the tension is still there. I still can't watch this alone and in the dark. Bonus points for an extra creepy soundtrack.
Alien: This movie at times has an almost dreamlike quality to it. It's beautifully shot as well as horrifying (the alien coming out of John Hurt's stomach is still one of the best moments in horror film history). And the alien is beautiful and disturbing.
Nosferatu: This film is still a beautiful example of German Expressionism, the movement that probably did the more for cinematography than any other school, director or technology. The vampire is ugly and creepy, much different from the charismatic vampires that would follow in movies and TV.
Ginger Snaps: This wicked little gem uses lycanthropy as a metaphor for growing up or more specifically, for puberty. Like I Was a Teenaged Werewolf before it, it puts teens in the roles of werewolves, but this time with a smart, witty and scary script.
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
In time for Halloween: TV Thrillers
What a great season to be a Sci Fi/Fantasy fan! Not since The X-Files and Buffy the Vampire Slayer were on prime time have there been so many science fiction and fantasy-based shows on network television. Hoping to catch the same audience that made Lost a such hit, the networks have given us two new creepy shows: Supernatural and Night Stalker. How do they compare?
Premise
Supernatural: Two brothers search for their missing dad, who became obsessed with occult-based crimes after their mother's death. By investigating mysteries that he would have been drawn to, they hope to find clues to his whereabouts.
Night Stalker: Carl Kolchak, a reporter, is drawn to mysterious and occult crimes similar to the death of his wife.
Winner: Tie - the premises are very similar. And yes, before you get all pop culture on me, read the next one.
Pedigree
Supernatural: Many of the episodes are directed by Kim Manners and written by John Shiban, both of whom worked on The X-Files.
Night Stalker: Based on the cult made-for-TV movie and television series staring Darren McGavin in the early 70s.
Winner: Night Stalker; the original is considered to be some of the best sci-fi/fantasy produced for television and definitely inspired The X-Files.
Sample Storyline
Supernatural: The brothers invesitgate a wendigo, a person now transformed into an evil spirit through cannibalism. The wendigo stalks hikers with uncanny swiftness and stores them in an underground larder.
Night Stalker: Kolchak investigates mysterious killings in a secret college society. The victims were literally scared to death. The killings were caused by the lingering fear of a little boy who was murdered by his father in the house where the rituals of the society take place.
Winner: Supernatural - Although neither plot sounds like much, it's all in the execution. Night Stalker's plot had holes and the resolution (including Kolchak burning down the house!) seemed silly. Supernatural, on the other hand, was actually scary and gross.
Production Values
Supernatural: A recent episode featured a shapeshifting creature that actually shedded its old appearance, including skin and teeth, into a gross puddle of goo.
Night Stalker: Generally, the show avoids monsters and even then shows them only as shadowy shapes.
Winner: Supernatural - No, the show isn't as glossy as a big budget Hollywood movie, but they do really well with what they've got.
Stars
Supernatural: Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki - though not big stars as yet, they are nice-looking boys and have done quite a bit of work.
Night Stalker: Stuart Townsend - an Irish actor who has been in such movies as Queen of the Damned and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Winner: Draw - I like all three. Townsend's film work might leave something to be desired, but somehow I still like him. Ackles and Padalecki have a good rapport and actually seem like brothers.
Winner: Supernatural edges out Night Stalker. Though I really want to like Night Stalker, I also really want it to be more: more scary, more interesting, more, ironically enough, like The X-Files; fans of the original series will be disappointed. On the other hand, Supernatural, unsurprisingly, feels like The X-Files and has intriguing, scary stories. However, both series lack a strong "mythology" plot, which has come to be expected from these sorts of shows. I hope they last long enough to get a chance to develop that story element.
Supernatural is on WB on Tuesday nights.
Night Stalker is on ABC on Thursday nights.
Premise
Supernatural: Two brothers search for their missing dad, who became obsessed with occult-based crimes after their mother's death. By investigating mysteries that he would have been drawn to, they hope to find clues to his whereabouts.
Night Stalker: Carl Kolchak, a reporter, is drawn to mysterious and occult crimes similar to the death of his wife.
Winner: Tie - the premises are very similar. And yes, before you get all pop culture on me, read the next one.
Pedigree
Supernatural: Many of the episodes are directed by Kim Manners and written by John Shiban, both of whom worked on The X-Files.
Night Stalker: Based on the cult made-for-TV movie and television series staring Darren McGavin in the early 70s.
Winner: Night Stalker; the original is considered to be some of the best sci-fi/fantasy produced for television and definitely inspired The X-Files.
Sample Storyline
Supernatural: The brothers invesitgate a wendigo, a person now transformed into an evil spirit through cannibalism. The wendigo stalks hikers with uncanny swiftness and stores them in an underground larder.
Night Stalker: Kolchak investigates mysterious killings in a secret college society. The victims were literally scared to death. The killings were caused by the lingering fear of a little boy who was murdered by his father in the house where the rituals of the society take place.
Winner: Supernatural - Although neither plot sounds like much, it's all in the execution. Night Stalker's plot had holes and the resolution (including Kolchak burning down the house!) seemed silly. Supernatural, on the other hand, was actually scary and gross.
Production Values
Supernatural: A recent episode featured a shapeshifting creature that actually shedded its old appearance, including skin and teeth, into a gross puddle of goo.
Night Stalker: Generally, the show avoids monsters and even then shows them only as shadowy shapes.
Winner: Supernatural - No, the show isn't as glossy as a big budget Hollywood movie, but they do really well with what they've got.
Stars
Supernatural: Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki - though not big stars as yet, they are nice-looking boys and have done quite a bit of work.
Night Stalker: Stuart Townsend - an Irish actor who has been in such movies as Queen of the Damned and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Winner: Draw - I like all three. Townsend's film work might leave something to be desired, but somehow I still like him. Ackles and Padalecki have a good rapport and actually seem like brothers.
Winner: Supernatural edges out Night Stalker. Though I really want to like Night Stalker, I also really want it to be more: more scary, more interesting, more, ironically enough, like The X-Files; fans of the original series will be disappointed. On the other hand, Supernatural, unsurprisingly, feels like The X-Files and has intriguing, scary stories. However, both series lack a strong "mythology" plot, which has come to be expected from these sorts of shows. I hope they last long enough to get a chance to develop that story element.
Supernatural is on WB on Tuesday nights.
Night Stalker is on ABC on Thursday nights.
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
3 Things that I love
1. A good cup of tea - I am an unashamed anglophile. I love teas of all kinds. I love cookies, cake, little tea sandwiches and generally anything that has to do with the ritual of making and drinking tea.
2. Gene Wolfe - Currently, I'm reading Latro in the Mist. A Roman soldier, after receiving a head wound, suffers from amnesia and can no longer make long term memories (think Memento). He also can see the gods...
3. Wacky, but clever inventions - MIT students are creating a machine that makes dishes on demand. It's cooler than you think.
2. Gene Wolfe - Currently, I'm reading Latro in the Mist. A Roman soldier, after receiving a head wound, suffers from amnesia and can no longer make long term memories (think Memento). He also can see the gods...
3. Wacky, but clever inventions - MIT students are creating a machine that makes dishes on demand. It's cooler than you think.
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
3 things that piss me off
1. The Broadcast Flag - Certain media companies want to implement copy protection for digital broadcast television and are seeking a law to do so. The law would compel companies making recording technologies to adopt a content protection language/technology/standard/whatever they're calling it this week. This is, of course, an attempt to stop pirating by assuming that all consumers are thieves; by stalling technological innovation and the reallocation of broadcast spectrum assets; and on some level, to invade our privacy by controlling what we can do with our computers and recording devices. I think the thing that really makes me angry, though, is that rather than embrace the technology and find creative solutions to piracy and copyright issues, these companies would rather spend millions of dollars fighting it.
2. The Military Keeping Databases of Children for Recruitment Purposes - according to this site, a section of the No Child Left Behind bill requires high schools to turn over student information to military recruiters. This isn't new actually, as quite a few of my friends in high school (in the 80s mind you) got calls from recruiters. And this isn't to say that serving in the military is wrong. What is wrong is not keeping parents well-informed about how their children's personal information is being used.
3. RFID Tags - These chips receive and respond to radio-frequency queries from special transmitters. Currently, they are being used to track inventory in stores, but other applications are being developed - for example, Michelin is embedding the tags in their tires to track them for possible problems. The State of California had considered even using them in their driver's license ID cards. So what's the big deal? Unlike UPC, the RFID tags are unique identifiers. With the right equipment, the tags can be read from a distance, allowing someone to stalk, spy or (in the case of RFID-equipped ID cards) even steal the identity of a person carrying an item with a RFID tag in it.
2. The Military Keeping Databases of Children for Recruitment Purposes - according to this site, a section of the No Child Left Behind bill requires high schools to turn over student information to military recruiters. This isn't new actually, as quite a few of my friends in high school (in the 80s mind you) got calls from recruiters. And this isn't to say that serving in the military is wrong. What is wrong is not keeping parents well-informed about how their children's personal information is being used.
3. RFID Tags - These chips receive and respond to radio-frequency queries from special transmitters. Currently, they are being used to track inventory in stores, but other applications are being developed - for example, Michelin is embedding the tags in their tires to track them for possible problems. The State of California had considered even using them in their driver's license ID cards. So what's the big deal? Unlike UPC, the RFID tags are unique identifiers. With the right equipment, the tags can be read from a distance, allowing someone to stalk, spy or (in the case of RFID-equipped ID cards) even steal the identity of a person carrying an item with a RFID tag in it.
Tuesday, September 6, 2005
Fall TV!
I am not ashamed to admit that I love television. One of the things I like about Fall is the new television season, with the return of old favorites and the promise of new shows. This season is a bit odd: most of the new shows are either crime shows or shows with a SciFi/horror bent, including 3 shows that deal with aliens both home-grown and extraterrestrial. I thought I'd share a list of shows I am intrigued by - I have not read any reviews of these yet, so I am going by description/premise only. Times are Central Time Zone.
Monday Night
Surface (NBC, 7PM, 19 Sep): Strange new creatures are discovered in the seas by people in San Diego, the Antarctic, Gulf of Mexico and Monterey.
Tuesday Night
Bones (FOX, 7PM, 13 Sep): Based on the real-life experiences and best-selling works of novelist-forensic anthropologist Kathy Reichs who solves crimes using evidence supplied by skeletal remains.
Supernatural (WB, 8PM, 13 Sep): Two brothers search for their missing dad and along the way help others who have been affected by supernatural creatures, a la Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the X-Files.
Wednesday
Lost (ABC, 7PM, 21 Sep): A favorite returns...
Invasion (ABC, 8PM, 21 Sep): Space invaders!
Thursday:
The Night Stalker (ABC, 8PM, 29 Sep): Stuart Townsend takes on the role of Carl Kolchak in this remake of the television show of the same name (which originally starred Darren McGavin).
Friday:
Threshold (CBS, 8PM, 16 Sep): A team of researchers invesitgate a mysterious and possibly extra-terrestrial craft found in the ocean.
Enjoy!
Monday Night
Surface (NBC, 7PM, 19 Sep): Strange new creatures are discovered in the seas by people in San Diego, the Antarctic, Gulf of Mexico and Monterey.
Tuesday Night
Bones (FOX, 7PM, 13 Sep): Based on the real-life experiences and best-selling works of novelist-forensic anthropologist Kathy Reichs who solves crimes using evidence supplied by skeletal remains.
Supernatural (WB, 8PM, 13 Sep): Two brothers search for their missing dad and along the way help others who have been affected by supernatural creatures, a la Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the X-Files.
Wednesday
Lost (ABC, 7PM, 21 Sep): A favorite returns...
Invasion (ABC, 8PM, 21 Sep): Space invaders!
Thursday:
The Night Stalker (ABC, 8PM, 29 Sep): Stuart Townsend takes on the role of Carl Kolchak in this remake of the television show of the same name (which originally starred Darren McGavin).
Friday:
Threshold (CBS, 8PM, 16 Sep): A team of researchers invesitgate a mysterious and possibly extra-terrestrial craft found in the ocean.
Enjoy!
Monday, August 8, 2005
A Tale of Two Tattoo Shops
This summer, there are not one, but two reality shows built around tattoo shops. Andy, being a tattooed man, of course was interested, so we've watched both. Here are my thoughts:
Show 1: Inked on A&E
Show 2: Miami Ink on TLC
Location
Inked: Palms Casino, Las Vegas
Miami Ink: Miami, FL
Winner: Inked - I prefer Vegas to Miami any day of the week and twice on Sundays.
Shop
Inked: Hart & Huntington, a swanky, modern-looking, red-walled shop
Miami Ink: bright, white-walled shop decorated with some art
Winner: Draw - H&H looks nice, but some of the shows centered on how dirty the shop was. Miami Ink's shop looks more like a traditional shop, but is clean, brand-new and seems well-run.
Focus
Inked: The artists and people who work on the shop
Miami Ink: The people getting the tattoos
Winner: Miami Ink by a long shot - the people in the shop in Inked are dysfunctional and whereas their personal problems might be interesting to some viewers, I rather see some actual tattoos and find out why people get them
Average Customer (featured on the show)
Inked: A guy wants something tattooed on his penis; random drunken gamblers/tourists
Miami Ink: A guy wants a tattoo of a turtle in memory of his cousin who drowned; a young mother wants to have a tattoo of a fairy redone in honor of her newfound sobriety
Winner: Miami Ink - the stories are compelling and touching. It's no wonder the producers chose to focus on the artists on Inked, because many of the customers are obnoxious jerks. Well, OK, it was sort of funny to see the guy who wanted something tattooed on his Johnson, but the manager and artists were so weirded out by him that it stopped being funny about a minute into segment.
Soundtrack/theme song
Inked: A pop-punk anthem to rebellion
Miami Ink: If I'm not mistaken, "Funky Kingston" by Toots and the Maytals
Winner: Miami Ink - no explanation needed
Favorite Artist/Character
Inked: Clark - a one-eyed, old-school artist who consoles the receptionist, Monica, during a rough time in her life
Miami Inked: Chris Nu�ez - the "hottie" artist who often does memorial tattoos, as he suffered his own tragedy at an early age
Winner: Tie - Clark is a more quirky and interesting character, but he gets little screen time. Chris is sympathetic person and does excellent work for his clients - he seems to really care about their pain
Schooling the Apprentice
Inked: Thomas makes Dizzle, the apprentice, tattoo a fruit; when Dizzle thinks he's going to do his first tattoo on a friend, Thomas instead brings in his old-school biker/former teacher, Rick Walters, who makes Dizzle tattoo himself
Miami Ink: Ami makes his apprentice, Yoji, wax his car
Winner: Inked - Ami may be a better teacher for all I know, but Dizzle's first tattoo makes for better TV
Relationships
Inked: Thomas's breakup with Monica is messy and ends with her quitting her job
Miami Ink: Yoji marries his pregnant girlfriend on the beach
Winner: Miami Ink - the ceremony was beautiful and it is refreshing to see people actually like each other on TV
Leader
Inked: Thomas
Miami Ink: Ami
Winner: Miami Ink - Thomas comes off as an insecure asshole; Ami, even when he's being a jerk, still seems to care about the people around him.
Hot Girl Moment
Inked: a drunken gambler passes out while getting a tattoo on her back
Miami Ink: Ami draws fake tattoos on a model for a photoshoot
Winner: Miami Ink - please.
Totals
Inked - 2
Miami Ink - 6
Draw - 2
Miami Ink is the clear winner. It's the better show, though I'm not sure how much coverage it's getting, both from the press, ads and the network, and I fear it might not last. Inked may have style, but Miami Ink has more substance.
For more info:
Inked: http://www.aetv.com/inked/crew.jsp
Miami Ink: http://tlc.discovery.com/fansites/miami-ink/intro.html
Show 1: Inked on A&E
Show 2: Miami Ink on TLC
Location
Inked: Palms Casino, Las Vegas
Miami Ink: Miami, FL
Winner: Inked - I prefer Vegas to Miami any day of the week and twice on Sundays.
Shop
Inked: Hart & Huntington, a swanky, modern-looking, red-walled shop
Miami Ink: bright, white-walled shop decorated with some art
Winner: Draw - H&H looks nice, but some of the shows centered on how dirty the shop was. Miami Ink's shop looks more like a traditional shop, but is clean, brand-new and seems well-run.
Focus
Inked: The artists and people who work on the shop
Miami Ink: The people getting the tattoos
Winner: Miami Ink by a long shot - the people in the shop in Inked are dysfunctional and whereas their personal problems might be interesting to some viewers, I rather see some actual tattoos and find out why people get them
Average Customer (featured on the show)
Inked: A guy wants something tattooed on his penis; random drunken gamblers/tourists
Miami Ink: A guy wants a tattoo of a turtle in memory of his cousin who drowned; a young mother wants to have a tattoo of a fairy redone in honor of her newfound sobriety
Winner: Miami Ink - the stories are compelling and touching. It's no wonder the producers chose to focus on the artists on Inked, because many of the customers are obnoxious jerks. Well, OK, it was sort of funny to see the guy who wanted something tattooed on his Johnson, but the manager and artists were so weirded out by him that it stopped being funny about a minute into segment.
Soundtrack/theme song
Inked: A pop-punk anthem to rebellion
Miami Ink: If I'm not mistaken, "Funky Kingston" by Toots and the Maytals
Winner: Miami Ink - no explanation needed
Favorite Artist/Character
Inked: Clark - a one-eyed, old-school artist who consoles the receptionist, Monica, during a rough time in her life
Miami Inked: Chris Nu�ez - the "hottie" artist who often does memorial tattoos, as he suffered his own tragedy at an early age
Winner: Tie - Clark is a more quirky and interesting character, but he gets little screen time. Chris is sympathetic person and does excellent work for his clients - he seems to really care about their pain
Schooling the Apprentice
Inked: Thomas makes Dizzle, the apprentice, tattoo a fruit; when Dizzle thinks he's going to do his first tattoo on a friend, Thomas instead brings in his old-school biker/former teacher, Rick Walters, who makes Dizzle tattoo himself
Miami Ink: Ami makes his apprentice, Yoji, wax his car
Winner: Inked - Ami may be a better teacher for all I know, but Dizzle's first tattoo makes for better TV
Relationships
Inked: Thomas's breakup with Monica is messy and ends with her quitting her job
Miami Ink: Yoji marries his pregnant girlfriend on the beach
Winner: Miami Ink - the ceremony was beautiful and it is refreshing to see people actually like each other on TV
Leader
Inked: Thomas
Miami Ink: Ami
Winner: Miami Ink - Thomas comes off as an insecure asshole; Ami, even when he's being a jerk, still seems to care about the people around him.
Hot Girl Moment
Inked: a drunken gambler passes out while getting a tattoo on her back
Miami Ink: Ami draws fake tattoos on a model for a photoshoot
Winner: Miami Ink - please.
Totals
Inked - 2
Miami Ink - 6
Draw - 2
Miami Ink is the clear winner. It's the better show, though I'm not sure how much coverage it's getting, both from the press, ads and the network, and I fear it might not last. Inked may have style, but Miami Ink has more substance.
For more info:
Inked: http://www.aetv.com/inked/crew.jsp
Miami Ink: http://tlc.discovery.com/fansites/miami-ink/intro.html
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